Damn I Hate Frustration
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Posted:Mar 28, 2006 8:01 am
Last Updated:Mar 28, 2006 9:18 am
1758 Views
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Can you ever have too much sex
Lately I have to say NO
Man I need it
Want to have it daily
Seems like I can`t due without
I could through him down as soon as he walks in the door
That`s not a good thing
and all
To tell the truth ladies
The toys just don`t do it
Sometimes makes it worse
And that`s so frustrating
If we had the time in the morning
I`d fuck him then and send him on his way
And if he came home for lunch
I`d feed him and get a quickie and send him back
After dinner I`d bring him to my room
And get him hard and keep him that way
For as long as possible
Letting him lick and suck and fuck
I get it pretty much nightly
Try to make last
But in the morning when he is gone
I get so damn frustrated
It`s a long 8 hours
Then the ride home
Thank god for weekends
Where I can get it all the time
Elf`s Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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Beauty ... Within or Without???
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Posted:Mar 27, 2006 8:44 am
Last Updated:Apr 6, 2009 10:00 pm
1817 Views
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Do I have it
I truly do not know
You do not see me thru my eyes
And sometimes I don’t see it
You have to understand
That most of my life
I could not find that beauty
No one ever told me
I’m not sure what that is
Always told it was within
Only one man ever told
That I was truly beautiful
If you could only see me now
And know how hard this is to write
There are truly tears in my eyes
But knew I had to write it
My self-confidence is not the greatest
But I am truly trying
It is getting better
With some loving help
Not all my poems are erotic
I had to write this one
Maybe it will help me
To find the beauty within and out
Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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mmmmmmmmmm New Things mmmmmmmmmmmm
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Posted:Mar 20, 2006 12:04 pm
Last Updated:Apr 2, 2010 10:04 pm
1849 Views
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Oh my god I love his tongue
You dont understand
I had to wait a loooooooooooong time
17 years in fact
He tried it once
And didn't like it
That was really frustrating
Was so looking forward to more
Didn't want to force it
So I let it go
Hoping that one day
He might try again
Many years go by
And we tried new things
Our sex life had its times
A lot up and very little down
Then something happened
Our fantasies came to play
We wanted to fulfill them
But the tongue I knew I wouldn't have
But one day you surprised me
And offered it to me
Did you think I'd turn you down
OH NO NOT ME NOT NOW
Asking you if you were sure
Didn't want to force you
I really wanted it badly
New I had to have it
I love it love it love it
There is nothing like it
Trying to get him to do it all the time
Had it twice on Sunday
And trying to describe it
I'm not sure that I can
But I know I have to have it
I cannot due without
Let me tell you one thing
It was worth the wait
Because now I can have it
Any time I want
I know I can not rate him
Because Ive had only him
But DAMN I really love it
Oh he is oh so goooooooooood
He has made me climax
Oh so many times
Now I know it was worth it
You can never stop
A very happy Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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The Maiden
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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 3:54 pm
Last Updated:Apr 25, 2007 12:16 pm
1887 Views
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Do I love my wife
Yes, more than life itself
Why do I love her so much
Can I put all into words
Do I have the words that can truly express
No but I think that I will try
I love her first because she loves me, with all my flaws, just the way I am
I love her because she makes me laugh
She is kind and considerate, gentle and sweet
Without her I am incomplete, empty, nothing
She is what fills the void in my heart, my soul, my life
She is my best friend, my lover, my soulmate, my twin flame
My Wife
Copyright© March2006 by Elf
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Oh no you don
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Posted:Mar 13, 2006 11:32 am
Last Updated:Apr 8, 2006 10:04 pm
1992 Views
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Little Red Riding Hood was on her way to see her grandmother in the forest. Her mother warned her "Don't walk through the forest, take the path, or else the Big Bad Wolf will catch you and suck your tits dry!"
Little Red started towards her grandmother's house but decided to take the shortcut through the forest anyway. The turtle stopped Little Red and warned her "Turn back and use the path, because if the Big Bad Wolf finds you, he'll suck your tits dry!"
Little Red was almost there, so she kept going through the forest. Sure enough, the Big Bad Wolf jumps out of nowhere and tells her "Take off your shirt Little Red Riding Hood - I'm gonna suck your tits dry!!"
"Oh no you don't", yells Little Red, as she pulls up her skirt, "You're gonna eat me just like the story says!"
And yet again, I have found another amusing little tale, I wanted to share.
Maiden's Lucky Elf
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Experienced???
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Posted:Mar 13, 2006 8:51 am
Last Updated:Apr 6, 2009 10:01 pm
1958 Views
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Am I experienced enough
Do I have what it take’s
Can I be the one
Who truly turns you on
Do my hands have the talent to
Touch you sweetly
Caress you tenderly
Take you into my arms
Do my lips respond to
Your needs
Your wants
Your longings
Can I truly be the one
I need to touch you
Caress you
Take you into my arms
I want to fulfill
Your needs
Your wants
Your longings
Come to me my love
Let me fulfill your needs
Your wants
Your longings
Let us experience each other
In every possible way
Finding our desires
Within each of us
Lucky Elf’s Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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Strangers Meet
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Posted:Mar 10, 2006 7:46 am
Last Updated:Apr 25, 2007 12:17 pm
2050 Views
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Do you see me standing there
Have you seen me watching you
Would you like to know what I want
Will you come to me
Walk my way you sweet thing
Stop and talk to me
Let me see your eyes
Have a drink and talk
Take a seat
Let’s have one more
Tell me about yourself
And I’ll tell you about me
Touch me sweetly
Kiss me lightly with your sweet lips
Let’s explore each other
Tease me, excite me
Let’s find a room lover
Explore ourselves some more
Take off all our clothes
Want to see it all
Want you to touch all of me
Start at the top and work your way down
Touch me every where
Excite me, tease me, please me
Now it’s your turn
Starting at the top, kissing those lips
Caressing that chest and working down
Stopping at that spot and using my tongue
Am I driving you crazy
Let me take you in my mouth
All the way working it well
Stopping to play at the head
Are you feeling it
Does it feel good
Let me lick some more
From the balls to the tip
What would you like to do
With that nice stiff cock
Do you want to fuck me
I want you to make me cum
I’ll climb on top
Slide you in
And ride you well
Can you make me cum
Make me cum, Make me cum
Faster faster you’re so good
Feeling you ooooh so good
Ooooooo oooooo so goooood
Lucky Elfs Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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Nude Beach
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Posted:Mar 7, 2006 9:53 am
Last Updated:Mar 9, 2006 8:43 am
2067 Views
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A young husband and wife were sunning on a nude beach when a wasp buzzed into the woman's vagina. The husband covered her with a coat, pulled on his shorts, carried her to the car and made a dash to the hospital.
After examining her, the doctor explained that the wasp was too far in to be reached with forceps. He suggested the husband try to entice it out by putting honey on his penis, penetrating her and withdrawing as soon as he felt the wasp.
The man agreed to try, but because he was so nervous, he couldn't rise to the occasion. "if neither of you objects," the medic said, "I could give it a try."
Under the circumstances, both agreed. The doctor quickly undressed, slathered on some honey and mounted the woman. The husband watched with increasing alarm as the doctor's thrust continued for several long minutes. "Hey, What the hell is happening?"
"Change of plans," The physician panted. "I'm going to drown the little bastard!"
Oh yeah, here yet another one that I found out there and brought in here.
Maiden's Lucky Elf
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My own personal toy
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Posted:Mar 7, 2006 8:19 am
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2024 2:22 am
1994 Views
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I like to play
Can you guess with what
Every man has one
And they love to have it played with
I love to use my hands
Caressing it gently
Playing with the head
Stroking the head
I love to use my lips
Kissing it softly
Teasing you with my tongue
Licking from your balls to your head
Taking you into my mouth
Sucking you in
Up and down slow than fast
Making you hard is what I want to do
Can you feel my mouth
Is it driving you crazy
Does it feel good
I want to make you very very hard
Now what do we do with it
Should I continue to suck
or put it else where
My pussy needs it bad
Put it in my pussy
Fuck me hard and deep
Make it last
Make it last
In my pussy
And in my ass
Fast and hard
Lets make you cum
Know lets start again
hope you enjoy
Elfs Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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Polish jokes?
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Posted:Mar 6, 2006 12:04 pm
Last Updated:Mar 6, 2006 6:45 pm
2060 Views
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Where did they come from? I often wondered why so many people would single out a whole nationality like that and label them as less than intelligent. Please don’t get me wrong I’m not usually one to slander people like that, but I have a real life story about as it so happens is a Polish gentleman I was acquainted with.
We were both setting in the back of a full van in late December many years ago, and this gentleman asked me if I lived in an apartment. I replied that no I lived in a house with my parents.
He than ask me if my house was warm, cause his apartment was cold. I said that yes my house was warm the furnace worked just fine, and asked him if he knew why his apartment was cold.
He said that there was a hole in one of his windows a had thrown a rock through it. I asked him if he had told his landlord, or even taped a piece of plastic or cardboard over the hole. His response was a simple “No.”
I than asked how long it had been since the window was broken, and he said that it had been over 2 weeks ago.
I had no idea how to respond to that. All I could think was OMG!!! I this what a typical Polish person is like? I have some idea where the jokes came from.
How the hell do you respond to a conversation like that without hurting his feelings?
I deeply apologize if this offends anybody, and I am by no means saying that all Polish people fit the jokes, but this certainly did and I could not believe it, I was completely floored.
It’s been many years since this and for some reason it came to mind today, it does seem kind of amusing after all this time. I decided to share after I was told that the jokes I have been posting have been around for a while, so I decided to put out something original.
Maiden’s Lucky Elf
Copyright© March2006 by Elf
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Lost & confused
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Posted:Mar 6, 2006 10:33 am
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2024 2:22 am
1947 Views
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A guy is driving out in the middle of nowhere, very lost. Finally he spots 2 houses so he goes up to the first house and looks in the door way. He sees an old lady yanking on her boobs and an old man jerking off.
He is so freaked out that he goes to the next house and says, "What's up with your neighbors?"
The owner of the house says, "Oh that’s the Robinson’s, they're both deaf. She's telling him to go milk the cow and he's telling her to go fuck herself!"
Yep, yep I found another that amused me and wanted to share. Please enjoy.
Maiden's Lucky Elf
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You turn me on
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Posted:Mar 6, 2006 9:20 am
Last Updated:Mar 6, 2006 9:29 am
1926 Views
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You turn me on
Not just part way
All the way
The way you look at me
Your beautiful green eyes and your smile
Sends a shiver up my spine
Then there's your lips
Every spot you touch with those sweet lips
Send a tingle that just wont quit
Then there's your touch
You know all the right spots
just the right pressure and oh my what a quiver
You put them all together
do you know what you do to me
Shivering tingling quivering
You turn me on babe
All the way
Full blast Oh my
What will I ever do
Thats right I married you
Keep turning me on babe
Almost 17 years of full turn-ons
I love you my Lucky Elf
Yours always Maiden
Copyright© March2006 by Maiden
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In an Elevator ...
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Posted:Mar 2, 2006 9:52 am
Last Updated:Mar 10, 2006 12:13 pm
1878 Views
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A dwarf gets on an elevator and pushes the button to go up, just before the door closes, a hand comes through and opens the door. In steps a very large black man. The dwarf stares and says "You’re the biggest man I have ever seen".
The man nods his head, and replies, "I’m 6-9, weigh 259 lbs., and I have 16 inches, I'm Turner Brown.”
The dwarf faints! After coming too, the dwarf asks the man to repeat himself.
So he does, "I said I’m 6 - 9, 259 lbs., with 16 inches, my name is Turner Brown.”
The dwarf looked relieved and started laughing. “For a minute there, I thought you said ‘Turn Around’.”
Oh Lookie here I found another one.
Maiden's Lucky Elf
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