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Hookup, Find Sex or Meet Someone Hot Now

wickedcat2006 49 F
145  Articles
banana vs vibrator!!   11/8/2017

Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator? A: "What are you shaking about, it's me she's going to eat.


2 Comments, 17 Views, 12 Votes ,5.10 Score
wickedcat2006 49 F
145  Articles
black testicles!!   11/8/2017

A Male patient just recovered successfully from a sex threatening health attack. He was wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose and laying on hospital bed. An young nurse came to cleanse his body with sponge. The patient mumbled, “Are my testicles black?” Nurse replied, “I don’t know Sir, I am just setting you clean” The patient repeated again, “Are my testicles black?” Nurse ...


1 Comments, 66 Views, 11 Votes ,4.48 Score
wickedcat2006 49 F
145  Articles
memory test?   11/8/2017

how good is your memory? <br><br> <br><br> i remember going to the party with my dad and went home with my mom!!! <br><br> explanation: daddy went to a party , happym; and then met mummy happyf;


1 Comments, 29 Views, 7 Votes ,3.30 Score
Skinny-Dipping   11/7/2017

An elderly man in Florida owned a large farm with a nice pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, and he even fixed it up with picnic tables, horseshoe runs, and some orange, and lime trees. <br><br> One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some ...


1 Comments, 79 Views, 12 Votes ,5.80 Score
franki2806 54 M
5  Articles
donky   11/5/2017

an old couple was siting in a bench and the old man asks his wife, how long does a donky live? and she looks at him and says why my love u do not fill good


1 Comments, 25 Views, 5 Votes ,4.12 Score
Sex Education   11/5/2017

A ten year old boy came racing in the house. “Mom, where do babies come from?” <br><br> Mom realizes this is an opportunity to talk to him about sex. She leads him into the bedroom and has him sit on a chair. She undresses and lies on the bed. She spreads her legs and tells him to come closer and get a good luck. She then spreads her lips and points to her baby channel. ...


1 Comments, 82 Views, 6 Votes ,3.08 Score
Badtrev 43 M
9  Articles
Random joke   10/31/2017

*Ill admit, this is a knock off joke I’d heard So a guy has just boarded a plane taking off to Los Angeles fo a little vacation by himself and as other people are taking their seats he notices a beautiful woman walking down the aisle in his direction. He thinks to himself “man, what are the chances she’d sit near me?” And low and behold she stops and sits right next to him. The flight ...


1 Comments, 87 Views, 11 Votes ,3.92 Score
firefighterldh 40 M
9  Articles
where what where who   10/28/2017

right in the pussy


1 Comments, 12 Views, 3 Votes
The Affair   10/26/2017

A woman is having an affair during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9 year old comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman’s husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already. <br><br> The little boy says, “Its dark in here.” <br><br> The man says, ...


1 Comments, 96 Views, 9 Votes ,4.92 Score
HarddinHou 29 M
12  Articles
best joke of all time   10/24/2017

its that time again... sex jokes, normal jokes, crazy jokes lets hear them <br><br> whats the best joke ever LIKE EVER


1 Comments, 20 Views, 0 Votes
Peonman2 61 M
7  Articles
Titties   10/19/2017

BB))B)You Know You're Getting Fat when Your woman spends all Night Sucking your Titis.


1 Comments, 14 Views, 6 Votes ,1.94 Score
catspajamashave 30 F
2  Articles
Three Men | Three Wishes   10/18/2017

Three men are walking along the beach one day when one of them suddenly stumbles, looking back they realise he had tripped on a dusty old lamp half buried in the sand. They all agree that, since they live in a joke not a pantomime, nothing would happen if they rubbed it... But also decide they'd feel sillier walking away from three wishes than they would for pointlessly rubbing the lamp! ...


4 Comments, 85 Views, 16 Votes ,3.13 Score
...in the bathroom...   10/16/2017

wife brushes her teeth while husband takes a shower behind the bath tub curtain...she suddenly hears some strange noises and asks her husbandquot; are you jerking off there???" Husbands responds: HE belongs to me and I can wash him as fast as I want...!!!!"


3 Comments, 64 Views, 11 Votes ,5.41 Score
redduracell 53 M
8  Articles
Phone rings   10/10/2017

-Alcoholic Anonymous there? -Yes brother, how can I help? -You are about to save my life brother. How do I make the perfect mojito?


2 Comments, 25 Views, 4 Votes ,4.41 Score
redduracell 53 M
8  Articles
Phone rings   10/10/2017

-Alcoholic Anonymous there? -Yes brother, how can I help? -You are about to save my life brother. How do I make the perfect mojito?


1 Comments, 31 Views, 9 Votes ,3.21 Score
FuckieBunny 40 C
1  Article
Would you like to go large with that meal?   10/7/2017

I wasn't sure where I should write this, I think it's quite fun to bring up the size of my cock on our second date but I've recently took a moment to think this out again. It is NOT under average at all, lets just get that out the way because my cock does have a temper. So, my friends from back home would have silly competition on who could jack off the fastest, that one was my worst ...


2 Comments, 55 Views, 7 Votes ,1.77 Score
A priest gets pulled over for a DUI   10/7/2017

A priest gets pulled over for a DUI check. The police officer can smell the wine on the priest, and he even sees an open bottle of red wine sitting next to the drive. When asked If he had been drinking, the priest said "Only water, officer." With that the police officer pointed at the open bottle. After looking at the near empty bottle of wine the priest smiled and said "Oh my ...


3 Comments, 60 Views, 9 Votes ,4.28 Score
Can't Take It   10/4/2017

With all the political correctness these days, it seems that people just can't take a joke for what it is anymore. I mean come on people, don't let a joke over shadow common sense and real decency. thoughts?


1 Comments, 19 Views, 3 Votes ,3.92 Score
winstonfunguy 56 M
12  Articles
Woman buys a parrot   9/28/2017

A woman decides to buy a parrot at the local pet store. The store owner explains the parrot was a rescue from the brothel that got closed down in a raid and that the bird may have picked up some bad language there. She takes her chances and brings the bird home. <br><br> When she gets home she hangs the cage in the family room and pulls back the cover. The bird opens his eyes, look ...


4 Comments, 84 Views, 13 Votes ,3.81 Score
winstonfunguy 56 M
12  Articles
Woman buys a parrot   9/28/2017

A woman decides to buy a parrot at the local pet store. The store owner explains the parrot was a rescue from the brothel that got closed down in a raid and that the bird may have picked up some bad language there. She takes her chances and brings the bird home. <br><br> When she gets home she hangs the cage in the family room and pulls back the cover. The bird opens his eyes, look ...


1 Comments, 9 Views, 2 Votes ,1.73 Score
winstonfunguy 56 M
12  Articles
Woman buys a parrot   9/28/2017

A woman decides to buy a parrot at the local pet store. The store owner explains the parrot was a rescue from the brothel that got closed down in a raid and that the bird may have picked up some bad language there. She takes her chances and brings the bird home. <br><br> When she gets home she hangs the cage in the family room and pulls back the cover. The bird opens his eyes, look ...


2 Comments, 19 Views, 5 Votes ,3.80 Score
winstonfunguy 56 M
12  Articles
Woman buys a parrot   9/28/2017

A woman decides to buy a parrot at the local pet store. The store owner explains the parrot was a rescue from the brothel that got closed down in a raid and that the bird may have picked up some bad language there. She takes her chances and brings the bird home. <br><br> When she gets home she hangs the cage in the family room and pulls back the cover. The bird opens his eyes, look ...


1 Comments, 8 Views, 3 Votes ,2.94 Score
winstonfunguy 56 M
12  Articles
Woman buys a parrot   9/28/2017

A woman decides to buy a parrot at the local pet store. The store owner explains the parrot was a rescue from the brothel that got closed down in a raid and that the bird may have picked up some bad language there. She takes her chances and brings the bird home. <br><br> When she gets home she hangs the cage in the family room and pulls back the cover. The bird opens his eyes, look ...


1 Comments, 7 Views, 2 Votes ,3.12 Score
whorecurious 62 C
164  Articles
Which Hair   9/26/2017

A lady is working hard in her office when a co-worker tells her that her hair smells good. Immediately, she goes to her boss and tells him that she has been sexually harassed. <br><br> "How?" asks the boss. <br><br> "He said my hair smells good, " replied the lady. <br><br> "Wouldn't you take that as a compliment?" ...


1 Comments, 70 Views, 10 Votes ,4.58 Score
uenjoymepdx 54 M
1  Article
Paid for sex   9/25/2017

A man comes home after a hard days work, only to find his wife of 20 years packing a suitcase of clothes and personal items. He asks, "What's going on?" His wife replies, "I'm going to Las Vegas. I heard I can get paid $800.00 for sex." The man's eyes get big and he immediately grabs his suitcase and starts packing it with clothes. "What do you think ...


2 Comments, 80 Views, 5 Votes ,4.12 Score
salsagirl822 67 F
21  Articles
Ice Cream   9/24/2017

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parkour. <br><br> Slowly and painfully, he pulled himself up onto a stool. <br><br> The waitress greeted him, asking how can she can help him. <br><br> After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. <br><br> The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?' <br><br> 'No, ...


3 Comments, 63 Views, 12 Votes ,4.39 Score
salsagirl822 67 F
21  Articles
Hot Mamma   9/24/2017

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. <br><br> A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. <br><br> A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?' <br><br> Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, ...


1 Comments, 80 Views, 9 Votes ,3.64 Score
sam197pulsar 37 M
84  Articles
Pistol   9/24/2017

A man was having premature ejaculation problems so he went to the doctor. The doctor said, "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself." That same day the man went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol and ran home to his wife. That night the two were having sex and found themselves in the 69 position. The man felt the urge to ejaculate and ...


2 Comments, 57 Views, 8 Votes ,4.87 Score
sam197pulsar 37 M
84  Articles
Sex pills   9/24/2017

A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her that it's still experimental. He tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner, so that night, she does just that. About a week later, she’s back at the doctor, where she says, "Doc, the pill worked great! I put it in the potatoes like you said! It ...


2 Comments, 47 Views, 7 Votes ,4.06 Score
sam197pulsar 37 M
84  Articles
Blowjob   9/24/2017

Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, ...


3 Comments, 50 Views, 6 Votes ,3.65 Score